Heather Mills hates the media and all the attention it gives her, and this is something we’ve learnt because she’s always on every single TV show ever banging on about herself all the time in funny high-pitched voices.
Not content with her unhinged GMTV rant against everyone who doesn’t think she’s brilliant on Wednesday, Heather Mills has now decided to take her argument stateside, popping up on the Today show, Extra and Good Morning America to reveal how she taped all her conversations with Paul McCartney, how Stella McCartney is ‘evil’, and the big dark secret thing that Paul McCartney did to end the marriage. Sadly for Heather Mills, these news claims aren’t likely to get as much publicity as her earlier ones, because at no point did she say the word ‘paedophile’ like a crying cartoon clown hopped up on helium.
It’s hard not to feel just a little bit sorry for Heather Mills. All she did was fall in love with a much older billionaire megastar for his personality and doughy face alone, and now the media won’t stop hounding her. And not the good sort of hounding, either, like when people say that Heather Mills is a wonderfully courageous woman who people should make statues out of – this is the bad sort of hounding that would quite like Heather Mills to stop talking about herself and go away, which we suspect is Heather Mills’ kryptonite.
And Heather has decided that enough is enough. Coming coincidentally quite soon after divorce negotiation with Paul McCartney broke down, possibly because she wanted to sell her story for cash and he wouldn’t let her, Heather Mills is on the rampage, telling the world that she’s sick of being lied about in the press while subtly hinting that their divorce was all Paul McCartney’s fault and that she’s got evidence to prove it that’d probably make a good book one day if anyone has the cash.
Although that last side didn’t come out during Heather Mills’ bewildering GMTV tantrum on Wednesday – mainly because she spent most of the interview’s 20-minute duration trying to pronounce the word ‘paedophile’ as ridiculously as humanly possible – now Heather Mills has appeared on American TV shows to expand on her version of events.
In an interview with Today, Heather Mills decided to speak out about how she saved Paul McCartney’s career, how Paul McCartney won’t accept that the divorce was all his fault and how Heather Mills used to take part in the traditional marital pursuit of recording all her conversations with Paul McCartney so it could be used as evidence against him should they ever divorce.
The full Heather Mills video is here, but if you can’t stomach the thought of listening to Heather Mills banging on about how unfair everything is for 14 full minutes, here are the choice quotes:
“Why do you think I’ve had to record every single conversation? Because nobody will believe me. When we split I said to Paul, ‘I’m going to be crucified. I’ll have a modern day stoning. You know why we split, you know the truth. You need to stand up and say, ‘I am responsible for the break-up of this marriage’. I said, ‘If you say that, I’ll walk away with nothing and we’ll do a gentle and quick divorce’. And he promised he’d do that and I have evidence of that. And he did nothing. He knows I was at a suicide point, and still nothing was done.”
“He was a broken man when I met him. He wouldn’t perform. I was a huge support for Paul. I put all my own work except my charity on hold for the seven-and-a-half years we were together.”
And, from another interview with Extra:
“Every single week Stella tried to break up our marriage. She was so jealous. She’s done some evil, evil things. She scraped my face out of a photo when they were in psychiatric session together.”
Incidentally, how could Heather Mills put all work except her charity aside for Paul McCartney when she said on Wednesday that she’s only ever done charity for the last 20 years anyway? That doesn’t especially add up.
Maybe this latest unannounced media onslaught will push Paul McCartney into giving Heather Mills the gigantic slice of his fortune as a divorce settlement that she seems to want, who knows? Actually, we sort wish it would, because then maybe Heather Mills could afford to buy a small island somewhere and do all her charity work in private without feeling the need to pop up to screech about herself on the telly all the bastard time.