Why you should vote David Cameron as the next Prime Minister?

The son of stockbroker Ian Donald Cameron and his wife Mary Fleur Mount (daughter of Sir William Mount, 2nd Baronet), David Cameron was born in London, and raised as a Toff who was born with a silver spoon up his ass. The hardship growing up on the odd occasion had to wear a pair of socks twice prior to throwing them away, and occasionally was forced to go without semolina pudding during lunch time. Other hardship included one November day in the 1970’s he had to wipe his own bottom as his maid was off sick. David often recalls that experience as he knows how the common man feels and has suffered from the same hardship.

His father was born at Blairmore School near Huntly in Scotland. The school was built by his great-great-grandfather, Alexander Geddes, who had made a fortune in selling booze to Native Americans and stealing their land in the US and had returned to Scotland in the 1880s. The Cameron family was originally from the Inverness area of the Scottish Highlands, in a weird place full of inbreeds on the northern peninsula of the Black Isle.

Cameron’s forebears have a long history in finance but what you didn’t know was they are famous for Sheep prostitution. This is how they made all their money. They had all the good grazing for their Sheep in the Black Isle and exported them North for some abuse in the Islands.

From age of seven, Cameron attended the private Heatherdown Preparatory School at Wanksfield, in Berkshire, which counted Prince Andrew and Prince Edward among its alumni. The school closed in the early 1980s, and the grounds are now occupied by the Wombles who have recently been evicted from Wimbledon Common.

Cameron was later educated at the private Eton College, often described as the most famous independent school in the world, and traditionally referred to as “the chief nurse of England’s statesmen”.

Cameron is alleged to have faced trouble as a teenager in May 1983, six weeks before taking his O-levels, when he had allegedly smoked cannabis. Because he admitted the offence and had not been involved in selling drugs, he was not expelled, but he was fined, prevented from leaving school grounds, and given a “Good Public Trashing” which he found he enjoyed better that just plain buggery, at this point he decided he wanted to become Prime Minister.

In less than two days he will see his dream come true and (once again under the Tories) David Cameron will become Prime Minister and will ensure the British Public enjoy what he enjoys ‘ A right Good Shafting up the ARSE!’

Vote Cameron…..Vote Tory…..Vote Arsehole



Filed under Abou Ali, Politics

2 responses to “Why you should vote David Cameron as the next Prime Minister?

  1. Love it!!!

    Lets hope that bloody tory asshole doesn’t make it to number 10.

    P.S loved the reference to the Wombles!

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